Wednesday
Apr232008
Just be honest
Wednesday, April 23, 2008 at 11:45AM
I've never really understood why people lie in situations where the truth isn't any more damaging, which is the case for about 90% lies in my opinion. Just be honest, it's really the much simpler and easier solution.
by atomicity
For example, you agree to dinner with Friend A. But after agreeing to the dinner, you find out that Friend B is having a pool party which you would prefer to go to, because who doesn't like pool parties. Now, assuming that you decide to go to the party instead of the dinner, how do you break the news to Friend A?
by tricky ™
Many people would come up with some sort of lie to justify them not showing up to dinner. "I'm not feeling too hot" or "I have to work late". But why lie? If you lie, Friend A is not going to be any less disappointed that you aren't coming to the dinner because you claim to be reading to orphans or something. Besides, people can tell that you are lying most of the time anyways, they just don't know why. All you gain with the lie is the appearance of a slightly more valid reason for bailing. But if Friend A is a reasonable person, they would accept the real reason just as readily as the lie anyways, without you having to risk all the negative consequences of being dishonest. So just be honest.
by Martin Deutsch
Furthermore, lying in many situations will just worsen the problem that caused you to lie in the first place. If you lie to get out of a date with someone you don't like, you're just delaying the inevitable and stringing the other person along. Now the other person is going to ask you out again because they'll assume (naively) that you still like them, but you were just busy that one time. Just be honest. If you lie to a close friend to go out with another, you now cannot tell your close friend anything that happened that night without introducing more lies. And there are always good stories from pool parties. Just be honest.
by Mike Monteiro
In almost all everyday situations, risking the negative social consequences of being caught in a lie outweigh the damage of telling the truth in the first place. The worst case scenario for telling the truth is generally that you are viewed as an honest person who made a decision the other person doesn't really agree with. Being caught in a lie means that you have now lost some credibility, and in the future your friends are likely to assume that excuses are actually lies when they are valid.
Just be honest.
by atomicity
For example, you agree to dinner with Friend A. But after agreeing to the dinner, you find out that Friend B is having a pool party which you would prefer to go to, because who doesn't like pool parties. Now, assuming that you decide to go to the party instead of the dinner, how do you break the news to Friend A?
by tricky ™
Many people would come up with some sort of lie to justify them not showing up to dinner. "I'm not feeling too hot" or "I have to work late". But why lie? If you lie, Friend A is not going to be any less disappointed that you aren't coming to the dinner because you claim to be reading to orphans or something. Besides, people can tell that you are lying most of the time anyways, they just don't know why. All you gain with the lie is the appearance of a slightly more valid reason for bailing. But if Friend A is a reasonable person, they would accept the real reason just as readily as the lie anyways, without you having to risk all the negative consequences of being dishonest. So just be honest.
by Martin Deutsch
Furthermore, lying in many situations will just worsen the problem that caused you to lie in the first place. If you lie to get out of a date with someone you don't like, you're just delaying the inevitable and stringing the other person along. Now the other person is going to ask you out again because they'll assume (naively) that you still like them, but you were just busy that one time. Just be honest. If you lie to a close friend to go out with another, you now cannot tell your close friend anything that happened that night without introducing more lies. And there are always good stories from pool parties. Just be honest.
by Mike Monteiro
In almost all everyday situations, risking the negative social consequences of being caught in a lie outweigh the damage of telling the truth in the first place. The worst case scenario for telling the truth is generally that you are viewed as an honest person who made a decision the other person doesn't really agree with. Being caught in a lie means that you have now lost some credibility, and in the future your friends are likely to assume that excuses are actually lies when they are valid.
Just be honest.
Reader Comments